Moon Heart

In my experience as a man and a Systemic Gestalt Therapist, the heart of a man is different than the heart of a woman. When a man realizes that, he can open the door to a whole new universe of love and sexuality

Full moon in the mountains. Photo by JR Korpa on

My heart feels sweet when I am with my lover Juliana. With her, I am shy and vulnerable, daring, and fierce. I never experienced that abundance before until I used a key that was given to me long before.

Yet only after years of work, I could open the door to my heart with it.


When I did a Tantra training, my teacher Eva taught us that woman and man co-create ecstasy in exchanging their Eros like in a cycle of polarities.


In the ancient Sanskrit language of Tantra, the Penis is called Lingam as the bringer of light, and the Vagina is called Yoni, the source.


In the teaching, it seemed natural to me that in this exchange, Lingam was the giving pole and Yoni the receiving pole.

Within this cycle of Eros, my teacher Eva included also the hearts: While the woman would receive energy in her Yoni, she would give energy through her heart to the man's heart.

Wait a minute. Now it got interesting.

To make this cycle of bliss between woman and man truly work, the tantric tradition said, the man's heart would take the energy of the woman's heart in his heart. Only this made the circuit between the genitals and the hearts of woman and man complete.


It took me years to feel the magnitude of this, and it changed the way I am as a man.


Full Moon behind clouds in Maastricht, Netherlands. Photo by Jeroen Andel on

This was the key to a hidden cycle between woman and man.


Just like the Yoni allows to let the Lingam's energy land in her––as the ancient explorer of sexuality experienced over millennia––the heart of a man allows the energy of the woman's heart to land in him.

I can feel my heart when I write this.


This is huge: In the circuit of ecstasy, my heart as a man is receiving energy just like the genitals of a woman!

In my exploration as a man, I started to realize what this means. On an energetic level of giving and receiving, my heart is my yoni.


I need to take a pause to let this land.


This insight crashed basically all concepts of being a man and allowed a totally new perspective on my heart.

How would I treat a Yoni? With care, adoration, sometimes fiercely but always with respect?


How if I would treat my heart with the same care and respect?


The Moon and the Sun together at Grand Tower, Illinois, near Mississippi River. Photo by Adam Dutton on

When I started to introduce this perspective in men's circles, men shared that they felt this is a shift of paradigm.


When a man loves his heart... like he loves a Yoni, the whole world changes.


After years of working with it in men's circles, my awareness got deeper. Now I perceive sexual bliss as an inner dance of planets in our universes.

The lingam as the giving pole is like a sun beaming his energy towards the Yoni.

The Yoni as the receiving pole is like a moon letting this energy land.

My heart, as a man, is a Moon Heart. The energy of the woman's heart is a Sun Heart.

In my Moon Heart, I receive her Sun Heart.


With that awareness, I shift the way I perceive my heart and take care of it.


My Moon Heart as a man has different needs than the sun heart of a woman.


Sometimes men ask me, we as men also can give love with our heart so how can it be that we have a receiving heart?
Man and woman of course give and receive love in a mutual exchange.

But there is a polarity of the hearts, not only a polarity of the genitals, and only that polarity makes ecstasy between man and woman happen.

To make this palpable, I like to ask the men in my circles to think of a moon as it shines in the clear dark sky.

Does it give love? Oh yes. It just does it by receiving the light of the sun.
But is it weak then? It moves oceans all over the world.

The power of the moon is different.

We as men just have to learn how to relate to it with its beauty and needs when we connect to our Moon Hearts, and from there to a Sun Heart.

Since I learn to be with my Moon Heart, my love and sexuality with my beloved have become a whole different universe.


Joachim C. Wehnelt

Systemic Gestalt Therapist


As the guardian of the Brothers Of Heart, I will start a new cycle for men: The River of Men––Inner Guidance for Men in a World of Change. More here.


c: SevenSenses.Online




A Sun Heart kisses a Moon Heart. Photo by Gama Films on

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  • Martina (Donnerstag, 11. Juli 2019 20:39)

    Lieber Joachim, das hast Du wundervoll beschrieben. Genauso ist es und ich freue mich sehr, dass Du Deine Erfahrungen und Dein Wissen an andere Männer weiter gibst. Ich liebe den term: "Moon heart" . Dazu fällt mir ein Sufi-Lied und Tanz ein: let my heart reflect thy light lord, as the moon reflects the light of the sun
    in Love, always in Love.
    Ist Deine Tantra-Lehrerin Eva Szabo gewesen? Bin nur etwas neugierig, da ich sie gut kannte und auch bei Ihr gelernt habe.

  • Mariëlle de Natris (Montag, 08. Juli 2019 10:17)

    Utter Beauty your words...

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